Highlights Gets Highlights

One of the nice little joys of my childhood was reading Highlights Magazine. I devoured each issue cover-to-cover, reading about science and history, trying the hidden pictures puzzles, and learning simple, but effevtive lessons in morality from Goofus and Gallant.

The magazine is mostly run out of Columbus, Ohio, but the editorial offices are in Honesdale, PA, the seat of Wayne County, which still largely maintains a small-town atmosphere. In order to compete more in a visual way with its competition, the magazine is undergoing a little facelift. Word to the staff: don't you dare mess with the Timbertoe family!

Story about Highlights Magazine design changes
Highlights Products official website
Highlights Foundation official website

Taking Advantage Of Catastrophe

It was a one-day news story last week: apparently FEMA (and therefore, the American taxpayer) was ripped off to the tune of well over $1 billion by Hurricane Katrina evacuees. Sick. Disgusting. Awful. And all too familiar.

In the days after 9/11, the American people showed incredible compassion by donating huge amounts of supplies to relief workers who were putting their lives and health at risk at the World Trade Center site in New York City. But according to an article I read, some of them were diverted, stolen really, by a company managing a warehouse holding the supplies.

So, here's the name of the bad guys: Kieger Enterprises (KEI) of Lino Lakes, Minnesota. These sick bastards should have been prosecuted for the thefts, but it seems the FBI thought they had enough evidence to get them on fraud allegations.

Somewhere, al-Qaeda members are smiling.

A Bad Game Of Capture The Flag

This week, the U.S. Senate will be taking up another proposal to change the Constitution, this time to prohibit "desecration" of the U.S. flag. Already passed by the House, the amendment would go to the states for the ratification process if it gets by the Senate. I hope this won't happen.

I won't go into detail attacking the grandstanding by both Republican and Democratic lawmakers trying to appear more-patriotic-than-thou. That's what those people do by instinct. But I will say this: true patriotism is about substance far more than it is about style. I notice a lot of flags out on display have become frayed since the days after 9/11 or the start of the Iraq war. What are the so-called patriots doing about these violations of the current Flag Code? Or the bedspreads, clothing, tablecloths, etc., made with a flag pattern ... shouldn't these be illegal as well? Or how about a flag with 51 stars or 47 stars, or a reverse order of the stripes? If a protester burns one in protest, and has the necessary documentation, can they be prosecuted? That's not an "official flag", after all.

Unless I've been in a coma, there hasn't been a rash of flag-burning over the years. But, anyone who steals a flag (either private or public) should be prosecuted for theft and vandalism. And, of course, marches and the like require parade permits that ensure order can be maintained. But if someone burns their own flag, it is a legitimate, if distasteful, form of protest. This is something which has worked pretty well for over two hundreds years. Let's not undo it with a bad and completely unnecessary law.

The Senate should not pass it along.

Record Review: Hello Young Lovers-Sparks

Well, I finally got around to listening to the latest Sparks record, Hello Young Lovers, after my girlfriend picked it up at Scotti's Record Shop. And, in some ways, I enjoyed it even more than I did their last effort, 2002's Lil' Beethoven. The first single of the CD, "Perfume", is quite catchy and bouncy, and has had a lot of airplay on WXPN this Spring. The song is a recitation of a man's 30 former lovers, and the scent (Helmut Lang, Davidoff, etc.) he associates with each of them. He's thinking, though, of his current girlfriend:

But you don't wear no perfume
That's why I want to spend my life with you

There are other cool songs as well. "Dick Around", the opening track, is a "Bohemian Rhapsody"-style epic that throws everything but the kitchen sink out there-lush string sections, electric guitar, and more-to illustrate how the song's narrator is frittering his life away. And this is typical of how the Mael brothers take some mundane parts of life, and so totally overdramatize them, to absurd levels, really, by repeating the lyrics over and over again. In "Your Call Is Very Important To Us", a phone call-hold message is repeated as well and alternated with a piano line.

Another highlight is "Metaphor", an advisory about how a firm understanding of metaphor is a key to getting women. There's a simple,clever chant:

Use 'em wisely, use 'em well
And you'll never know the hell of loneliness

But it soon builds up to a terrific crescendo: "Chicks, dig, dig, d-i-g, dig, dig, metaphors!" Funny stuff!

I've listened to these guys sporadically over the years, and their changing sound. This is a good, fun CD, and now, I think I'll go back and listen to what I've missed.

The Official Sparks website
The Sparks MySpace site
My previous post linking "Perfume" and Stilton Blue Cheese

The House Always Wins

Hi, everybody, I'm AllMusicFan, and I'm not a gambler.

I know it goes against many of my libertarian instincts to be bothered by this headlong rush by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania to introduce casino gambling to the state. Who am I to tell people what to do with their money? After all, we're told it'll bring jobs to depressed areas, reduce property taxes, compete with Atlantic City, and who knows, maybe cure the common cold, too. But today, I read an editorial by Bruce Shimmel in Philadelphia's City Paper, which described a public hearing on casino plans for Philadelphia:

The proposed casinos were all boxes, boxes, boxes. Styled in oh-so-tasteful Olde Tyme or Retro or Futurama themes, they were warehouses lined with slot machines, all carefully engineered to produce more losers than winners. In the last wicked twist of the industrial revolution, we're planning factories that manufacture poverty.

For the rest of us, who actually live here, we will get a path along the river. But to get there, we'll have to schlep around the boxes and dance with the traffic cutting conga-lines in our neighborhoods.

This is great stuff, because it encapsulates so much of what I dislike about the gambling industry.

It wasn't enough that thirty-some odd years ago, the states began setting up lotteries to raise money for seniors and kids. They weren't honest enough, after all, to just raise taxes on rich folks, or not to splurge on other spending. No, they had to sell the excitement of winning with some great PR campaigns. That way the public doesn't see it for what it essentially is: a regressive tax. You don't see Paris Hilton standing on line to buy a Powerball ticket, do you?

But it wasn't enough. No, states had to adopt casino gambling, to compete with Las Vegas. First, Atlantic City was supposed to be transformed into a shining city. And for a few blocks, it has been. Newsflash: the rest is still a dump, rife with crime, corruption and poverty. Then, other states got into the act. And Las Vegas responded by ramping up its advertising and marketing efforts.

A few years ago, I was in New Orleans, and out of curiosity, more than anything else, went to Bally's riverboat casino. After walking in, I took a look at people standing in line to get gambling chips. Bedraggled ... infirm ... I was immediately disturbed by what I saw. These were people who should be saving their money, getting involved with community groups to maximize their individual power, not cashing their pension or Social Security checks on a losing bet. This isn't the glamorous, beautiful people who can play around with lots of free cash at the Borgata in A.C. that I'm talking about.

So, again, who am I to tell people what to do with their money? Well, it's fine with me as long as people have something to fall back on when hard times hit - a social net of family, friends, church, and community. But I fear we've become so atomized as a society that the only recourse for many will be their fellow taxpayers. And that's not fair.

Can You Hear This Now? Good!

I heard today that some high school kids are getting around classroom cell phone restrictions by using ringtones that their teachers (who are older) cannot hear. So I checked it out, and I'm happy to report that I did hear it. Which is surprising to me, given my years of Walkman use and many concerts. So there!

Check for yourself by clicking here

Great Song: "I Wanna Be Your Dog"

I'm sure most of you know the impact of "I Wanna Be Your Dog" by The Stooges. Pre-dating the era of the Clash, Sex Pistols, the Ramones, et al., by nearly a decade, this is punk rock at its purest. Over a blazing, three-chord guitar riff, Iggy Pop screams about the pain of teenage hormones:

So messed up I want you here
In my room I want you here
Now we're gonna be
face-to-face
And I'll lay right down in favorite place
And now I wanna be
your dog
Now I wanna be your dog
No I wanna be your dog
Well c'mon

Raw & loud? Of course, that's what makes it so good! And the perfect thing for a warm Spring-going-on-Summer day.

For a fun listening experience, check out some covers here. Bowie's is pretty cool; others on the site are by Joan Jett, Uncle Tupelo, the Meat Puppets, and many more!

Covers of "I Wanna Be Your Dog"

Remember "By Mennen"?

At my job, first thing I do is review the websites of various advertising and marketing magazines. This morning I read how the AARP has hired a company called DMI Music and Media Solutions to come up with a strategy to make make sound & music part of AARP's brand identity. If a musical cue works for Intel, or "Law & Order", the reasoning goes, it will help AARP stregthen its bond with current members, and of course, the huge number of potential members represented by the Baby Boom generation. The boomers are turning 60 this year, including President Bush and former president Clinton, have been getting a lot of attention for it. But they, and many others are undoubtedly already members; one can join AARP at 50.

Besides incorporating music into its marketing, AARP is also looking at developing a music festival, CDs, an online music site, and more. Since AARP already offers all kinds of financial, travel, legal, and medical services (among others) directly or through partnerships with other companies, it has the potential to make quite an impact in coming years. You can read more here.

Appel Farm-Not A Weather Report!

I think I've finally dried out from Appel Farm yesterday. Yes, it rained, of course, it rained. I know I prayed a lot for no rain. But sometimes, the answer is "no".

My girlfriend & I had a pretty awesome time. Musically speaking, there was a lot to love. The ladies all pined for James Hunter; despite dabbing at his face from the humidity in the air, he was the epitome of cool. Danielia Cotton once again belted out another terrific performance, including "Shame" (which is now my favorite song of hers). Crooked Still & Cabin Dogs showed a lot of promise, The day was topped off for us by a fine performance by Richard Thompson. The man is a total master of the guitar, and his rendition of "1952 Vincent Black Lightning" was absolutely bone-chilling.

We ran into a lot of fellow XPN volunteers and boardies during the day, which was cool. But it was also just really nice to sit, even in the rain, eat some yummy couscous salad, and listen to great music!

I Guess Y'all Aren't Busy These Days?

So, the President is going to be speaking tomorrow in his weekly radio address about the need to amend the U.S. Constitution to prohibit "gay marriage." The Senate will be debating an amendment, which, if passed (it's already gone through the House), would go to the states for the ratification process. But really, is this necessary? There are so many problems this country is facing. Here are the biggies: the war against Islamist extremism, the war in Iraq, the high price of oil, illegal immigration, the budget deficit, Iran, North Korea. I think this is a bone the administration is throwing to a segment of the so-called "right wing" which is unhappy with Bush and just may sit out the 2006 elections. But social legislation, by-and-large, should not be written into the Constitution. Defining "marriage", and legal recognition of unions by gays and lesbians who are consenting adults is a matter best left to the states, and their legislatures to decide.

Appel Farm Is Coming ... Is The Ark Ready?

The Appel Farm Arts & Music Festival is this coming Saturday, and once again, boasts an impressive lineup. Richard Thompson is the headliner as far as I'm concerned, although Fountains of Wayne will be going on last. No offense, but Richard Thompson's long career speaks for itself. I can't wait to see him. Then there's James Hunter, the British R&B/Soul sensation who apparently is spending a lot of time lately in Philadelphia. My girlfriend & I wanted to see him a few weeks back at an XPN Free At Noon concert, but couldn't find any parking due to the Penn Relays. Danielia Cotton, whose record Small White Town I named as my Best of 2005, is going to be there-she is a terrific performer! And, of course, there's arts, crafts, food ... and hopefully, no rain. I'll be saying my prayers.

Look for photos, reviews, and stories of a dry, fun-filled day next week!